After watching the test match, someone has written some rules have to be incorporated by ICC to give the other teams a perfect clarification
(1) Ricky Ponting – (THE TRULY GENUINE CRICKETER OF THE CRICKET ERA AND WHOSE INTEGRITY SHOULD NOT BE DOUBTED) should be considered as the FOURTH UMPIRE. As per the new rules, FOURTH UMPIRE decision is final and will over ride any decisions taken by any other umpires. ON-FIELD umpires can seek the assistance of RICKY PONTING even if he is not on the field. This rule is to be made, so that every team should understand the importance of the FOURTH UMPIRE.
(2) While AUSTRALIAN TEAM is bowling, If the ball flies anywhere close to the AUSTRALIAN FIELDER(WITHIN 5 metre distance), the batsman is to be considered OUT irrelevant of whether the catch was taken cleanly or grassed. Any decision for further clarification should be seeked from the FOURTH UMPIRE. This is made to ensure that the cricket is played with SPORTIVE SPIRIT by all the teams.
(3) While BATTING, AUSTRALIAN players will wait for the ON-FIELD UMPIRE decisions only (even if the catch goes to the FIFTH SLIP as the ball might not have touched the bat). Each AUSTRALIAN batsman has to be out FOUR TIMES (minimum) before he can return to the pavilion. In case of THE CRICKETER WITH INTEGRITY, this can be higher.
(4) UMPIRES should consider a huge bonus if an AUSTRALIAN player scores a century. Any wrong decisions can be ignored as they will be paid huge bonus and will receive the backing of the AUSTRALIAN team and board.
(5) All AUSTRALIAN players are eligible to keep commenting about all players on the field and the OPPONENT TEAM should never comment as they will be spoiling the spirit of the AUSTRALIAN team. Any comments made in any other language are to be considered as RACISM only.
(6) MATCH REFREE decisions will be taken purely on the AUSTRALIAN TEAM advice only. Player views from the other teams decisions will not be considered for hearing. MATCH REFREES are to be given huge bonus if this rule is implemented.
(7) NO VISITING TEAM should plan to win in AUSTRALIA . This is to ensure that the sportive spirit of CRICKET is maintained.
(8) THE MOST IMPORTANT RULE: If any bowler gets RICKY PONTING – “THE UNDISPUTED CRICKETER WITH INTEGTIRY IN THE GAME OF CRICKET” more than twice in a series, he will be banned for the REST OF THE SERIES. This is to ensure that the best batsman/Captain will be played to break records and create history in the game of CRICKET.
These rules will clarify better to the all the teams VISITING AUSTRALIA
Permalink
Leave a Comment
We regret to announce the sad demise at Sydney of our dear relative Sir Cricket Gentlemaangame. He was assassinated at SCG| mercilessly by two terrorists who are conclusively identified by various video footage reports as one Steve Buck, who is neither here nor there. The other accomplice is identified as one son of Ben. There was also a posse of 11 accomplices led by a ruffian Rickety who was always pointing a finger. All the 11 accomplices had to do was give a shout even when the ball was touching the pad or ball had kissed the grass and up would go the assassin’s fingers.
Brave defence put up by Jumbo and his platoon was not sufficient to save Sir Cricket. He breathed his last alas. All are invited to the funeral to pay tributes to a fine Gentleman who fell today thanks to connivance of a brutus called ICC (actually I dontC idontC) owned by a man called Speedy Malcom who will soon be awarding Bravery awards to Buck Ben Pointing et al for finally killing Sir Cricket so that millions of hours can be saved by sendingback to doing some work.
They are right now sharpening knives to fork into a plate of bhajji served up by an alleged simian called simond and further fall out is expected. Please attend the services at your own risk
Permalink
Leave a Comment
Here is how umpires Steve Buckn
or West Indies and Mark Benson of England dealt deadly blows to India in the second Test against Australia. 
Day 1: # Australian skipper Ricky Ponting nicked a Sourav Ganguly delivery going the leg side to wicketkeeper Mahendra Singh Dhoni. Ponting, who was at 17, did not walk as Benson turned down the Indians’ appeal. The skipper went on to score 55 before being ironically given out leg before despite getting an inside edge.
# Then came the blunder which probably changed the course of the match. All rounder Andrew Symonds edged Ishant Sharma to Dhoni but to the horror of the fielding side, Bucknor remained unmoved. Symonds was given another reprieve when the third umpire shockingly erred in giving him not out on a stumping appeal. The right hander went on to score an unbeaten 162 to take Australia to safety after being 134 for six.
Day 2: # Another escape for Symonds as Bucknor turns down a close stumping appeal without consulting the third umpire.
Day 3: # One of the rare umpiring blunders that went India’s way as Sachin Tendulkar survived a close leg before shout when on 38 before going on to score his 38th Test hundred.
Day 4: Benson turns down an Anil Kumble appeal for a leg before against Michael Hussey despite the ball hitting the batsman’s pads plumb in front. Hussey was on 22.
# Benson is at it again, Hussey edged one from RP Singh to Dhoni but both the batsman and the umpire were unmoved. Hussey was on 45 at that time and went on to score an unbeaten 145.
# Having taken Hayden and Clarke in consecutive deliveries, Kumble seemed to have got his hat-trick after having Symonds trapped LBW but Bucknor says no. Symonds scored 61.
Day 5: # Probably the most horrifying day for the Indians, Bucknor gives Rahul Dravid caught behind of Symonds despite the ball missing the bat by miles.
# Sourav Ganguly is caught at slips by Michael Clarke but the catch appeared to have come off the ground. However, instead of going to the third umpire, Benson checks with Ponting, who quite expectedly calls it clean.
Permalink
Leave a Comment
or West Indies and Mark Benson of England dealt deadly blows to India in the second Test against Australia. 