Obituary
We regret to announce the sad demise at Sydney of our dear relative Sir Cricket Gentlemaangame. He was assassinated at SCG| mercilessly by two terrorists who are conclusively identified by various video footage reports as one Steve Buck, who is neither here nor there. The other accomplice is identified as one son of Ben. There was also a posse of 11 accomplices led by a ruffian Rickety who was always pointing a finger. All the 11 accomplices had to do was give a shout even when the ball was touching the pad or ball had kissed the grass and up would go the assassin’s fingers.
Brave defence put up by Jumbo and his platoon was not sufficient to save Sir Cricket. He breathed his last alas. All are invited to the funeral to pay tributes to a fine Gentleman who fell today thanks to connivance of a brutus called ICC (actually I dontC idontC) owned by a man called Speedy Malcom who will soon be awarding Bravery awards to Buck Ben Pointing et al for finally killing Sir Cricket so that millions of hours can be saved by sendingback to doing some work.
They are right now sharpening knives to fork into a plate of bhajji served up by an alleged simian called simond and further fall out is expected. Please attend the services at your own risk
